Seriously Mom, I'm Really Sorry

So a few weeks ago, someone pointed my attention to a blog called Sorry Mom.

Or, the full title - "I Bang the Worst Dudes - Sorry, Mom." (http://sorry-mom.com)

It's filled with amazingly ridiculous tales women have submitted about the ridiculous guys they've slept with. I think my favorite was something along the lines of "after we had sex, he patted my stomach and said 'this is where the babies will go!"

And, for someone still smarting from a confusing rejection by The Youngin, it seemed like a perfect place to get rid of any bitterness I might still have about it. So, I post.

After going through a rough breakup I chose to pursue this cute veiny-armed boy as a rebound. Unfortunately, the dude never uses his tongue (even while making out), and didn’t get me off even once during our month-long fling. Though he had started buttering me up with talk of seriously liking me, he quickly went MIA and refused to look me in the eye in public, which was only made more awkward by the fact that he worked at my favorite bar. Oh well.

This was obviously edited, as I would never say "buttering me up" (who would?), but you get the general gist. I also used a picture (they black out the eye area) from his MySpace, which is retrospect wasn't the most subtle move. But c'mon, we were casually hooking up for a few weeks, like I have a picture of him. Weeks went by, and a few of my friends were surprisingly paranoid. "He's going to find it!" says one. "That is bad karma!" says another. And I simply laughed.

Until this morning when I get a text from The Youngin. Keep in mind, this is the first time I've heard from him in ... weeks. Months even? He's since begun dating a rather unattractive (understatement? perhaps.) art student. Though I've become great friends with a girl in his band, so occasionally interaction is sometimes required. But for the most part we simply wave at each other in bars, little else.

He texts, "Works at your FAVORITE bar? Drag.."

I snicker to myself, rather surprised at how little I'm embarrassed to get caught in this seemingly embarrassing state. I text back:

"Ha! Was wondering how long it would take you to find that. Pissed? Seriously, water under the bridge - the site is hilarious and i couldn't resist. But, if you don't see it that way i can always ask them to take it down. Thoughts?"

I thought it was a suitably casual response. Making it clear it was more me finding the premise hilarious than me as crazy wronged woman.

He responds, "Lame..." which isn't really an answer at all.

I think about responding with a promise to take it down, though I don't find it particularly offensive or un-true (though two friends did point out that calling someone a bad kisser and all around bad in bed isn't particularly pleasant to hear...) but eventually I decide to leave it with the first casual response.

Sorry I slept with you? Possibly. Sorry I posted about it on the internet? Not really.

But yeah, sorry mom.